Devotional - The Comprehensiveness of The Parent’s Role
"All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work." — 2 Timothy 3:16-17
Read time: 3 minutes
Hi Reader,
People often tell you to keep taking care of yourself once you become a parent. It sounds good, but anyone who has experienced parenthood knows that it’s easier said than done.
How you divide roles and responsibilities among the household is up to every family. However, no matter how equally tasks are assigned, mothers differ from fathers, and it shows.
When I look at the parenting roles my husband and I have, we do things our way—which is good. But where he can get things out of his system quickly, I can sometimes ruminate over little things for hours, like sleep schedules for our children or what kind of themed birthday cake we should get.
I’m a planner. For example, I want to schedule what my children will eat for an entire week. My husband finds it important, too, but he has a more laissez-faire attitude and can approach things flexibly.
This is just a small example of the mental load that comes with parenthood, and it scratches the surface of all the extra things and responsibilities you have to think about and do on top of all the physical caring. Of course, there are exemptions, and there are tools to help go about this, but overall, the mental load is real—whether it's predominantly more on the mother or the father.
Being a parent is the most beautiful role you can ever get and execute, but it is also a comprehensive role. We need to take care of all the physical and mental load, but we can only do that if we have the energy.
That’s why people keep telling you to take care of yourself.
How do you do that?
Especially when you add the complexities of being a business owner, freelancer, or working on side projects.
You learn to plan, multitask, let go, nurture, inspire, and grow.
That’s overwhelming… but you grow into it.
How fortunate we don’t have to do it alone.
Our guide is the Holy Spirit. He will give us wisdom when we need it (James 1:5) and patience when we are about to break down (Galatians 5:22-23).
Our guidebook is the Bible. It's full of advice on how to raise our children in a loving, responsible, God-fearing way. And when we know, we grow in confidence, which affects how we feel mentally.
I could write an entire book on managing time and juggling the mental and physical load of parenthood (and maybe I will someday), but for now, let's do something difficult: surrender.
If God sees children as a heritage He entrusts us with, He will surely help us raise them. He is gracious; let’s be gracious, too. He is patient; let’s take it step-by-step.
To close off this email, here’s a list of practical things you can do to lighten the load or to have some me-time.
It will help you 'do it all,' and take care of yourself!
5 Practical Steps to Lighten the Mental Load
1. Surrender Your List to God
Before you plan your week, take 5 minutes to pray and give your schedule to the Lord.
"Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and He will establish your plans." (Proverbs 16:3)
2. Schedule your week and the to-do’s for the family
Block out 15 minutes at the beginning of the week and reflect on everything that needs to happen. Do this preferably with your partner next to you. I call it: week review.
Add all to-do’s in a calender, online or on paper. (at the moment, I’m trying out Any.do and testing if this works for our family)
3. Ask for Help Without Guilt
Normalize asking for help. God didn’t create us for solo missions.
“Carry each other’s burdens…” (Galatians 6:2)
4. Create a Recharge List
Write down 5 things that refresh your soul (hot shower, call with a friend, quiet Bible reading, short nap, coffee outside). Keep the list where you can see it and schedule some time this week to execute one.
5. Connect with Other Parents
Find a trusted friend or join a small group. You don’t need a big tribe—just one or two people who get it.
“Iron sharpens iron.” (Proverbs 27:17).
This content is based on the newest Bible plan on YouVersion. Check out our plans if you want to go deeper on topics such as parenthood, time management and entrepreneurship.
Blessings,
Jane
Founder Born to Fly
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